Latest Ramblings from Q1 2010 (First Quarter, 2010)

Road Crossings et. al.

UiTM Shah Alam's Science & Technology (S&T) Complex
comprises of 5 faculties: Civil, Mechanical, Medicine, Electrical, and Chemical Engineering. The funny thing is, 90% of the girls there exhibit a similar trait. That is, how they cross the road.

See, this S&T Complex sits right in front of 2 female student hostels; namely Mawar and Melati, which makes the 2-lane road that splits them a fluid sardine can every peak hours. (0800, 1200, 1800). Being a student there for almost 4 years, I observed that there is an uncanny similarity of how about 85% of the girls there cross the road. I'll outline the steps one by one for you.

1. Stand at the curb (usually they'll travel in groups of 2 to 4)
2. Look left and right (ONCE!)
3. Cross the 1st lane. If there's a vehicle in a distance of 3-5 meters, it is (STILL) deemed safe.
4. Suddenly, in the middle of the 1st lane, one person decides (says) "eh eh, krete, krete, back, back...".
Here, either 2 things happen:
a) they fully retreat to the curb, GIGGLING "hee hee hee...".
b)they stay there, right smack in the middle of the 1st lane, GIGGLING "hee hee hee...".

When option (a) takes place; the passing car goes through, with a facepalm.avi inscribed on their faces.

When option (b) takes place, the passing car stops, allowing the group to pass. The driver wears a smile, that can ONLY translate to (Hai, gilo apo bebudok nih.. [kecek Kelate for teh LOLz])

Once in a blue moon, some drivers would raise their right hand ala Karam Singh Walia, maybe while saying "WOI, MAU MATI KA???!!!!111!!!" Funny, I did this once.. :P

So, after the crossing has occured, the GIGGLING will continue until they reach the other side of the road.

Rapid KL Pole Hoggers

This behavourial pattern is usually observed in Rapid KL buses, no matter la which bus, but for the sake of simplicity I'll narrow it down to 3 in particular: Laluan Dalaman, T603 and T604.

Again, being a student in UiTM Shah Alam for almost 4 years, I have come to a conclusion that 98% of UiTM female students who use Rapid KL to go to their classes every day have a potential to become POLE DANCERS. Yes, POLE DANCERS. I maybe stereotyping, but just bear with me for a moment.

Now, what those girls usually do (especially during peak hours), is RUSH to the bus front door, pushing like some hungry Somalis in front of a UN rations truck; all trying to get in for a single, SINGLE objective: to get a seat. I don't get it.

JUST FARKING QUEUE LA, GODDAMN IT!

Now here's where it gets interesting. The first 10 person to get in will; without fail, find the nearest pole and hug it. Not hold it, HUG IT. It is until they realize there are more people is reaching for the pole then they give up some space. Oh, about 10 cm like that....

Now, all them pole hoggers cause another problem. Since the poles are mostly at the front of the bus, they are bottlenecking other passengers who are trying to get in. It's either when someone, oh let's say, ME, say "Akak, tolong masuk ke dalam sikit boleh?" Then they move. About 30 cm above, like that. Well, at least I can move to the back; because I don't want to smell their farts (ok, that one is just for teh LOLz).

Then the driver gets in, saying "Dik, tolong gerak ke belakang..". Well guess what? Now they all move orderly to the back, occupying all the spaces.

However, in extreme cases, the driver will open the back door and let the others to get in.

Now, can you understand my stereotyping of the said group of females?

So, what's the moral of the story?

Discuss.